a pretty dress of hers hanging on the door, waiting for her to come and pick it up. I had liked Kathryn a lot and for some reason was impressed by this pretty personable girl and as she was about 7 or 8 years older than I, she had a decidedly mysterious aura, for a shy naive 16 year old. So I was fascinated by the dress and eventually yielded to an extreme desire to try on the pretty garment.
I was surrounded by feminine attire, so to speak, with three older sisters and so had every opportunity to put on girl's clothing if I desired and I had no desire to wear my sisters' things. But here, I took off my shirt and trousers and got into the dress and was delighted with the extremely pleasant feeling it gave me and it was with mixed feelings of guilt and satisfaction that I replaced the dress and went downstairs. I remembered Kathryn and her dress for sometime after they were both gone and I had a mild de- sire, or perhaps curiosity, sometimes - in fantasy only - to again see how it would feel to wear girl's clothing and I tried to put such thoughts completely out of my mind, as unthinkable for a boy to even be daydreaming about.
And so it was some months later that I yielded to an increasing desire to again try on girl's clothing and I made my first purchase of feminine attire, an inexpensive dress and slip, hose and pumps in incorrect sizes, after very nervously and timidly and even blushing in one instance, telling the girl clerks that the things were for my sister. Of course, again, I do not know why I did not merely use my sisters'attire, except that the anticipated thrill of wearing my sisters 'things apparently was not as great. So I went to the expense and embarrassment of purchasing my first feminine attire, now at the age of 17.
In several days, however, I was overcome with the feeling of shame and guilt and confronted with the accepted premise that boys should not and must not wear girl's clothing, the clothes were disposed of and I attempted to push the desire to wear fem- inine attire completely from out of my thoughts.
15.